A "Once Upon a Dream" Halloween

There's a lot of build-up to Halloween night.

You know, haunted houses and pumpkin carving and such.

But the real Halloween holiday season payoff is the big night and getting to wear costumes.

Heidi and I wanted to do a couples costume.
We struggled to decide on what we'd be, until we landed on the idea of Prince Phillip and Briar Rose.

This is what we were shooting for:

With the help of some pieces from HCT rentals, and my amazing mother making my tunic and hat, I'd say Heidi and I rocked our costumes. And I gotta admit it feels cool carrying a sword around all night.

Conclusive proof that Heidi is a princess in disguise

My sister Megan joined us, appropriately/coincidentally dressed as a blue fairy, and we had a fun night visiting several friend parties.

Yes, that's a ghost horse photobomb

Heidi and her SLAC friends in great costumes

Hmm, what to be next year... It'll be hard to top this one.

What were you? Did you do a couples or group costume?

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Happy Halloween from George and Lenny Pumpkin

Happy Halloween, friends!

Today is the big day for all the ghouls and goblins and witches and warlocks out there.

It's also showtime for all the jack o'lanterns so painstakingly carved in the last couple weeks.

Heidi and I carved some pumpkins a few weeks ago, and we were happy with how they turned out.

Gotta start with good-shaped pumpkins.

As a (mostly) black cat, Amelie wanted in on the Halloween festivities.

Since mine turned out kinda goofy, and Heidi's was more serious/legit, we named them George and Lenny after the characters from Of Mice and Men. 

But instead of tending the rabbits, they want to suck their blood. Makes sense, right?

The finished product, our George and Lenny look-alikes.

The masterminds with our carved creations.

I've never looked better, I know.

Carving pumpkins was lots of fun, and then Heidi put the cherry on top of our Halloween-festivities sundae by cooking up the seeds and bringing them to work for my coworkers and me. Delicious!

I think this had brown sugar, chipotle chili powder, and cumin.

Note: sadly, our jack o'lanterns didn't last until Halloween. Although decomposing gore certainly fits the Halloween theme, I imagine the smell wasn't quite worth it. Next time we'll carve them closer to the big day!

If you're gonna carve jack o'lanterns still, please be careful and don't pull a Dr. Steve Brule:

HT: Heidi's tumblr

Have a safe and happy Halloween, everybody!
Can't wait to see the costume pics on your Facebook and Instagram pages today and tomorrow!

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Haunted Houses: For the Fun of Getting the Crap Scared Out of You

I don't like being scared. I don't like horror movies. I just don't like that stuff.

But at Halloween, I can like the right kind of scary, and haunted houses have a certain appeal.

Granted, I'm still freaked out the whole time, but at least I'm holding a really cute girl close to me the whole time while being terrorized. And it's only one month of the year, so I can man up.

Heidi and I went to the Nightmare on 13th haunted house earlier this month, and it was great.

Intense, clever, surprising, and just the right amount of scary.

There were three sections to the building, each with different scare tactics, designs, and creatures.

1) Dark Harvest: an evil farm where the plants have grown into monsters and kill all they can find. Better than I'd expected, with great sets and unexpected use of textures of things hanging and even the floors. 

2) 13 Levels of Fear: a walkthrough of 13 popular fears, from heights to clowns to hell to the number 13. Another that I underestimated. The heights room was especially cool; we want to know how they did it!

3) Mutant: a parasitic goop is loose, and it's mutating the people in a facility. The military is trying to contain it, but you've got to get through without getting infected or killed. Pretty good, but I liked the other two sections more.

I don't know if Heidi was protecting me more, or if I was protecting her. Probably a lot of both.

But it was a fun night at the haunted house, and I didn't have a heart attack, so I'm happy.

I'm obviously very good at protecting my date.

All smiles having survived the scares for this year.

If you're considering going to a haunted house in the last couple days of October, or even this weekend, Nightmare on 13th is a good one. And here's a coupon to save a few bucks.

What do you think of haunted houses? Are you a fan of them?

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More Like a Fail Mary... or ISO Train Companion

A few people have asked me (offline) what ever happened with my hail mary attempt.

So here's the answer:

Nothing.

I knew it was a long shot, so my expectations of success were low (though I still hoped).

Well, the pass wasn't a touchdown.
Actually, I can't be sure it was ever even received, since I didn't hear anything at all.

But such is life.

While I was thinking of her in Justin Timberlake lines:

I don't wanna lose you now

I'm lookin' right at the other half of me...

And I'll tell you baby, it was easy

Comin' back into you one I figured it out

You were right there all along

She was thinking of me in Taylor Swift lines:

We are never ever ever getting back together

We are never ever ever getting back together

You go talk to your friends talk

To my friends talk to me

But we are never ever ever ever getting back together

And it was a hail mary, which rarely work out in either football or dating.
So I'm not too surprised.

To quote President Gordon B. Hinckley, 15th President of the LDS Church:

Anyone who imagines that bliss is normal is going to waste a lot of time running around shouting that he’s been robbed. The fact is that most putts don’t drop, most beef is tough, most children grow up to just be people, most successful marriages require a high degree of mutual toleration, most jobs are more often dull than otherwise. Life is like an old time rail journey…delays…sidetracks, smoke, dust, cinders and jolts, interspersed only occasionally by beautiful vistas and thrilling burst of speed. The trick is to thank the Lord for letting you have the ride.

The hail mary didn't pan out, but life goes on.
And I'm still looking for my train companion, because it's going to be a fantastic voyage when I find her.

So there's no need to feel bad for me, or worry about me, or any such thing.
I've grieved for the end of a relationship, as is painful but healthy, and life has now begun anew.

You know, I've never actually taken a cross-country train ride. Anyone want to join me?
I also accept referrals (maybe not in comments, please send me an email)...

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My Hail Mary is En Route

Let's just say I'm Doug Flutie, and I'm really hoping that Gerard Phelan comes down with my pass.

If it's caught, then I assure be jumping for joy just like Flutie did.

Better believe I'm saying extra-strong prayers these days.

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"The Truth About Guys" is Spot On

This guy Nate and I need to be friends.

His article "The Truth About Guys" is so right.

The difference between Nate and me is that I know who the girl is that I love.

Though, as you, my reader friends, know, there are complications.
And while I want my love to be as spotlessly clean as Nate describes it, I know real love is messy.

Another smart fellow, Tyler, wrote this great post "How I Know My Wife Married the 'Wrong' Person".
As easy as taking options #1-3 might be, I'd rather go with option #4.
Love is and will be hard. Really hard. Really, really hard at times.
But it's worth the effort, because the shiny moments with the girl you love are priceless.

Time to get to work.

PS Thanks to all of you for your support both off- and on-line after my last post. You are wonderful, and I'm not ready to give up just yet!

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Unprepared for a Great Love: Part 2

Emily, I'm sorry I wasn't prepared to be the man you deserved.

I blew it. Again. 

I know I did, and I take full responsibility for blowing it.

We Smyth boys (all boys?) aren't the smartest when it comes to recognizing love when it's in our arms.

Both of my married brothers dated incredible women, then broke up, and then later realized they'd messed up by breaking up and that they wanted to spend the rest of their lives with those marvelous ladies. Fortunately for my brothers, their wives gave them another chance.

I'm apparently a little more stubborn, and it's taken me two breakups to figure out how to be the man I should have been all along. I knew I loved you after one breakup, but I still hadn't sorted out how to show it and communicate it and be patient when things didn't go exactly how I'd wanted them to in my head.

Now I just feel like these guys are singing my thoughts and emotions:

"Lego House" by Ed Sheeran

"When I Was Your Man" by Bruno Mars

And though I feel this way and I'd like it to be the case, I know it's a stretch to ask for at this point.
"We Belong Together" by Mariah Carey, Lenny Kravitz & K'naan vs Max Herre

Charity and love are closely related, and some versions of the Bible use the word "love" in 1 Cor. 13:4-7, which I find very apropos right now.

4 Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. 5 It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. 6 Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. 7 It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. (source)

I've got a long way to go to live up to that kind of love, but I'll get there someday.

It's hard to admit, but you deserve better than I was. Maybe better than I'll ever be. You're an amazing woman, worthy of the very best in life and love. And I know the Lord has someone that's right for you, I just kinda feel and wish it could still be me.

Whatever happens or doesn't happen between us going forward, I know that I've been changed for the better and for good because I knew you.
"For Good" from the musical Wicked

Whoever it is that has the luck and lifelong joy to be your husband, I hope he buys you flowers, and holds your hand, and takes you to every party, because I sure do remember how much you love to dance.

Of all these things I've done, I think I love you better now.

I'll always love you, Emily, and I pray you find every happiness in life.

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"Life is Like a Mop"

Inspirational speeches come from all sorts of places.
I watch a fair amount of movies, so that's one of my primary sources.

For example, the blue-faced Braveheart rallying cry (link).
Or the Herb Brooks "beat the Russians" peptalk from Miracle (link).

But right now, I'm really taking to heart this motivational speech from a favorite childhood movie, UHF.

Because even though I may feel like my life is "full of dirt and crud and bugs and hairballs and stuff", it can be rinsed off and I can start all over again.

Side note: Awesome that "Battle Hymn of the Republic" is playing at the climax of his speech. I'd never verified it before, but the version used in the movie just so happens to be sung by the Mormon Tabernacle Choir (source) with the Philadelphia Orchestra. Pretty cool, huh?

And so, friends and random readers, consider this my virtual standing up, going to the window, and yelling, "These floors are dirty as hell, and I'm not gonna take it anymore!"

Anybody got a spare toothbrush?

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End of One Road, Beginning of Another

Looks like both cases from my 'Accepting What You Can't Change' post are decided.

#2 wasn't really in doubt. I don't anticipate him seeking reconciliation, as that'd require him admitting fault.

But today I was informed that #1 will not happen either. No reconciliation to be had in the future.

Which means I'll be eating the rest of these Raspberry-flavored Milanos tonight, since I don't feel like going to buy a gallon of ice cream:

I hate knowing that we'll no longer be in each other's lives, but having finality is a good thing as it allows for leaving it to God and moving on.

"What the future holds, I don't know
Gotta stand up, dust myself off,
Just for now, it's the end of the road."

Here's to new beginnings on a new road.

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Accepting What You Can't Change

I've had a couple big relationship things weighing heavily on my mind lately.

Not high profile to most people, even in my inner circle, but the situations are hard on me nonetheless.

The two cases have to do with apologies and the giving and receiving of forgiveness.

Case #1- I've apologized and I'm waiting to see what she decides to do. I was in the wrong, so she'll be fully justified in deciding to accept my apology or not. I'll understand either choice.

Case #2- I've apologized and tried repeatedly to mend our friendship, and it looks more and more like the person will not reciprocate apologies and allow us to continue as friends. He's shown to be stubborn and vindictive and bully-ish, so I can't see reconciliation happening.

So when a friend posted the link to this ThoughtCatalog article, it was a godsend to me:

"How to Accept What You Can't Change" by Brianna Weist

Its lessons - particularly #7 - support what I recently read in a book about apologies and forgiveness:

If your first attempt [at apologies/reconciliation] fails, I suggest you make a second and third attempt. An apology says, "I value this relationship, and I want to deal with this problem." The refusal to apologize says, "I do not value this relationship, and it's okay with me if we continue to be estranged." We cannot force an apology but we can extend the olive branch and express our willingness to forgive. If, in the final analysis, they are unwilling to restore the relationship, you may then release them to God and release your hurt and anger to Him. Don't allow their unwillingness to deal with the problem destroy your life. It takes two people to build a positive, healthy relationship.*

Once we've done our best to seek forgiveness, the ball is in the other person's hands.

In case #1, she can choose to accept my apology and forgive (maybe she already has), with or without the option of reconciliation. She would be justified either way. At this point, I can release my pain and hurt to God. Of course, my preference would be reconciliation between the two of us.

In case #2, I've done all I can do, and as I don't see any forgiveness occurring, I can release the relationship to God and move on. Sometimes friendships end. I suppose all relationships have a lifecycle, even ones that began half a lifetime ago in high school.

So now I can just allow things to happen as they may (for these cases) and accept what I can't change.

*Things I Wish I'd Known Before We Got Married, by Gary Chapman, pp 71-72. I highly recommend this whole book to anyone wanting healthier relationships, both before and after marriage. Lots of it can also be applied to improve friendships.

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Happy Valentines Day, All You Lovable People!

And "lovable people" includes every single person who reads (and doesn't read) this post.

I hope we don't take the people we love for granted the other 364 days of the year, but this (kinda like Christmas) is a good reminder for each of us of something we should constantly be aware of.

So let's all show extra kindness and love to those we cherish and value so much, but maybe don't tell as often as we should.

Give a kind word.
Give a long-overdue shout-out.
Give a bouquet of flowers.
Give a box of chocolates.*
Give a hug.
Give a kiss.
Give of yourself.

Because that's what life is about.

And it'd be a shame to wait one more day to let these people know they're one of the best things to happen in your life.

Spread the love!
Happy Valentines!

*Or celery or green peppers or carrots or whatever the person likes.

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16 Ways To Blow a Marriage

I've never been married.

So I can't speak from experience on how to keep a marriage intact.

Yet I can see the wisdom (and honest humor) in this guy's blogpost, which he gained through the sad experience of several failed marriages.

After you read his tips, please come back and add any additional thoughts you have in the comments.

CLICK HERE TO READ "16 Ways I Blew My Marriage".

PS The "bonuses" on some of the tips are pretty funny.

What did you think? Anything else you'd add, married or long-dating friends?

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Sometimes You've Just Gotta Dance

Does anyone else feel like sometimes you've just gotta dance?

(Yes, I know I'm not fitting Dane Cook's comedy sketch, although I'd of course prefer dancing with a girl over going solo.)

A classical* song can induce visions of expertly executed ballroom dancing.

Including from some of the best Disney movies.

Powerful emotions can be displayed through soulful contemporary (1, 2), modern, or hip-hop dances.

Unlikely dance style combinations can captivate viewers.

Or a super-happy-fun song can just make you want to dance in the car or bounce wherever you are.

Now who feels like going out and dancing with me?

*Either actually written during the classical period or modern in a classic style, I like them both.

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Fruit Picking and a Peach Brunch

We should probably all eat more fruit than we currently do, right?
Well buying it from the grocery store is good, but picking your own from the bush or tree is even better.

Emily and I headed up to Larriland Farm for a little fruit picking, and then we met up with Seth and Becky at Homestead Farm to finish our picking with a bunch of peaches.

I'm glad this one picked me

Meet giganto-berry

You say tomato; I say tomatoe

Hard to decide which one is sweeter

Looking for the best ones

Yes, I'll gladly wheel this one to my car

"In open fields of wild flowers..."

And what is the point of picking a bunch of delicious fruits, if you can't eat them while conversing with a bunch of friends? For that reason, we invited some friends over for a Sunday peach brunch.

Peach muffins

Peach french toast

After all the picking fun and subsequent delicious eating, I just have one question:

When can we go again?!

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Walking on Sunshine

I had an excellent Monday night.

Even if you have no idea what I'm talking about, I hope you're happy for me right now.

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Unprepared for a Great Love

Why is it that we often don't understand what we had, and how great it was, until it's too late?

Not that we always do that. But sometimes we do. And sometimes it's painful to realize that what we didn't properly value at the time could have been a life-changer.

While this can be the case with job opportunities, stock investments, travel choices, and many others, I think we see it most clearly in matters of the heart, don't we?

I had a great opportunity with a woman that I like-liked, and I blew it.

Just that simple.

It was right in front of me, and, for a myriad of reasons, I wasn't prepared for what may have been the most important choices and love of my life.

That sucks to recognize, when it now may be too late.

A part of me still hopes there is a chance at reconciliation and a return to us, as I now feel prepared to love fully and make the sacrifices and changes necessary to be the man she wants and deserves.

If that isn't enough, then so be it.

I am and will be ready.

My next chance, I don't want to be caught unprepared for a great love.

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Metallica Monday: Unforgiven

Just a short one, because I'm not really in the mood to blog.

It's been a rough couple days, as a relationship came to a sad end and will not be revived as I'd hoped it might be. Guess that's just how it goes sometimes. And nothing against her, because I was the one who blew it by not being prepared when we had our chance.

So here's today's Metallica Monday choice, from the classic black album:

Unforgiven

Later.

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A Night of Artomatic Fun

My friends have a wide variety of talents. Last night, I saw one of my friends perform a few bellydancing routines at the Artomatic 2012 show in Crystal City, VA.

She did a great job, and I was impressed at the body control, as I know I could never get my hips and upper body to move the way she and her fellow dancers did. Way to go, Alice!

After rocking her group routine

The gang there to support

Going solo

After the performance, we all looked around at the various art exhibits, which ranged from sculptures to murals to small paintings and photography. There were even Lego creations and the famous Washington Post Peep-o-ramas to check out.

Nyan cat made from Legos

That is one large Peep!

We spent about 2 hours walking around and only saw 3 of the 10 floors. I'm thinking I'll have to go back another time or two to check out a couple more floors. Very interesting stuff!

Makes me want to get artsy and create something...

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