I blew it. Again.
I know I did, and I take full responsibility for blowing it.
We Smyth boys (all boys?) aren't the smartest when it comes to recognizing love when it's in our arms.
And though I feel this way and I'd like it to be the case, I know it's a stretch to ask for at this point.
"We Belong Together" by Mariah Carey, Lenny Kravitz & K'naan vs Max Herre
Charity and love are closely related, and some versions of the Bible use the word "love" in 1 Cor. 13:4-7, which I find very apropos right now.
Whatever happens or doesn't happen between us going forward, I know that I've been changed for the better and for good because I knew you.
"For Good" from the musical Wicked
Both of my married brothers dated incredible women, then broke up, and then later realized they'd messed up by breaking up and that they wanted to spend the rest of their lives with those marvelous ladies. Fortunately for my brothers, their wives gave them another chance.
I'm apparently a little more stubborn, and it's taken me two breakups to figure out how to be the man I should have been all along. I knew I loved you after one breakup, but I still hadn't sorted out how to show it and communicate it and be patient when things didn't go exactly how I'd wanted them to in my head.
Now I just feel like these guys are singing my thoughts and emotions:
"Lego House" by Ed Sheeran
"When I Was Your Man" by Bruno Mars
And though I feel this way and I'd like it to be the case, I know it's a stretch to ask for at this point.
"We Belong Together" by Mariah Carey, Lenny Kravitz & K'naan vs Max Herre
Charity and love are closely related, and some versions of the Bible use the word "love" in 1 Cor. 13:4-7, which I find very apropos right now.
4 Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. 5 It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. 6 Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. 7 It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. (source)
I've got a long way to go to live up to that kind of love, but I'll get there someday.
It's hard to admit, but you deserve better than I was. Maybe better than I'll ever be. You're an amazing woman, worthy of the very best in life and love. And I know the Lord has someone that's right for you, I just kinda feel and wish it could still be me.
Whatever happens or doesn't happen between us going forward, I know that I've been changed for the better and for good because I knew you.
"For Good" from the musical Wicked
Whoever it is that has the luck and lifelong joy to be your husband, I hope he buys you flowers, and holds your hand, and takes you to every party, because I sure do remember how much you love to dance.
Of all these things I've done, I think I love you better now.
I'll always love you, Emily, and I pray you find every happiness in life.
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